I should explain why I have been reeeaaally pissed off/sad/meh lately. I've pissed many people off in my expressions, so I might as well give an explanation. Besides the whole guy thing, people have just been making me feel bad about myself lately. Like, they're either trying to ram things I don't want to think about into my head, thus causing me to OVER think it and stress myself out about it, when I have better things to do. Yes, allowing these things to affect me so much is my own fault. I don't deal with stress very well, but atleast I am aware of it and trying different methods to do something about it.

First off, a friend of mine from middle school recently messaged me, asking me why I'm not talking to him anymore and how it hurts him that I ignore all of his messages and phone calls. Now, I have a legit reason for doing this: He makes me feel uncomfortable. I don't feel safe talking to him. But now I feel all bad because I still have a habit of being too nice to people.

Next, certain friends of mine who, whenever I hang out with them, feel the absolute need to talk about my last relationship, and ask stupid questions like "Oh, did you cry alot?" "Were you sad?" Gee, I dated a guy for 9 months, fell in love, and ended up getting heart broken and replaced..Hmm...Crying? Sadness? naaaaah. I thought I'd go have a celebration at Shakey's and get lots of useless stuff with my tickets!...Morons.... Oh and the people who try to make it as though I'm the bad guy and how I screwed him over and shit like that. Okay, now I am not gonna play the blame game right now, because I'm having a very nice day, and don't want to deal with shitty feelings later, all I'm going to say is: If you don't know what happened, SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP. and mind your own damned business. If you know exactly what happened, by all means, have whatever opinions and cruel names you like, but if you can tell that I'm trying to change the subject , stop talking. If I want to talk about it, I'll talk about it. Otherwise, don't bring it up. Why? Honestly, I'll feel like shit for the rest of the day and I don't want that.

And of course, school has just been reeally stressful. Especially math because my teacher is a fucking retard. And I jist have alot of work to do. I know that it's partially my fault for procrastinating on certain assignments, but at the same time, when I'm not exactly sure about what I'm doing, and the person who is "teaching" me doesn't either, it's not that difficult to get off task.

All that being said, I apologize to my guy friends here about my last journal, and to the friends I refer to in the relationship paragraph (I love you guys, but you gotta stop it.) I'll be on later!

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